Topic: Being offended

[Endless~Knot]

“Think about it: what weakens us is feeling offended by the deeds and misdeeds of our fellow men. Our self-importance requires that we spend most of our lives offended by someone.”
― Fire from Within

Everyone is going to get offended from time to time. It happens. Someone says or does something, the hairs on our bodies stand up, we become alert, and we're itching for a fight. Not fun when you feel offended. "That person is a jerk! Did he really say that to me? How dare he?" Oops, I just got offended.

Another big one is not just things directly, but say people have rigid beliefs, and someone say mocks them. They feel offended not just for themselves, but now its about offending their God, or their guru, or their savior. They get offended and take it personally. Get angry. But in the end, I wonder of the gods or the gurus or saviors really care...

Its a good test of self-importance when you get offended. Its the ego having its trip. The world cannot be confirmed and shaped perfectly to our liking. Some thing offends is going to be natural. Thats not as much the issue. Its our 'reaction' in what the offense does to us, which can set us back. Eventually we can temper the flame of the offense. But if we remain slighted, offended, upset, we might start an inferno with it. We may go batshit crazy. We might even hit someone cause so offended. Being offended can make us angry and we can do stupid things as a result.

Words can offend. When you think about it, what really are words? Someone just formulated a sentence or two in their mind, and it came out. Words only have power over us if we allow them. And we do see say in the media, they do have power. They definitely do. Like say I rip on my kids and cut them down, they will feel it. So I choose my words wisely, but not all do this.

You cant spend your life being offended by folks or you will remain angry and bitter. Just try to see words as words, and dont worry about the words behind the words. Because those words may be full of ignorance or anger by the other person. Try to rise above the situation and if you do feel offended, really meditate on it. "Why did that get to me?" You'll probably see you are creating something out of nothing, and it doesnt need to effect you in such a way. Water off a ducks back. We will get offended, but we have to show we are bigger and better than the offense itself.

[Michael]

This is a tricky one. In our secret life, if we are advocates of the path to freedom, then obviously to be manipulable by the offensive behaviour of others is simply a bad mistake. To free ourselves from this is a much more complex task, as it goes very deeply into our formative influences. Typically, those who had supportive parents are less vulnerable to offence, while those who suffered from the psychological abuse of their parents find it almost impossible not to become upset by offence. It's the luck of the launch.

But the world does not respect people who do not get offended. For some strange reason, the world respects those who get angry, and especially those who get angry at offensive remarks. Otherwise you are seen as a wimp, someone without force and of no account - easily pushed around.

Thus for a warrior, it is essential that we disguise our lack of offence, once we have achieved that freedom. We have to generate a sense of righteous outrage from our public self. Others should not know we don't give a shit. This is why I say we should be free of being offended, but we should know 'how' to take offence. How to take offence is a calculated response, not a reaction, and no one should ever think we are not a force to be reckoned with.

There is a little secret here, when public appearance is not an issue. Pass the offence over the fence - drop it out of your life, but tag it in a way that you 'know' the universe will find a way to redress the insult. Be careful with this, because the offender may not deserve such a ruthless consequence. You are tagging for karma to be applied by a power that cares little for compassion. This opens further issues of how to approach those who are not on the path, but that's another matter.