The problem is that that shift is too temporary to change a life long pattern. It is a major starting step, the first time you realise it yourself, but woefully insufficient to turn the Queen Mary around.
To me, this is the challenge. For myself and in dealing with others. Let's face it, we all here, I'm pretty sure, have experienced, glimpsed or held on to that moment ... that aha! what the hell am I doing? What is the solution ... There was always someone there "holding out their hands" to us, even if we didn't see them at the time.
What to do.. what to do.. I ask for other suggestions when we find ourselves surrounded by such things in this world. In service of spirit.. is there more the coyote can do?
Stand tall and shine untouched as an example.. a positive reflection?
Yes! Because your shining is infectious and it spreads. I've witnessed it with others who have no idea what "path" I'm on, or what philosophy I prescribed to. It's true Presence of Being. It has such a huge effect on others!
Yup - this is it in a nutshell, Michael. In my own dealings with a former friend/associate who was on the path, a new term came into being. Simply put: negative pleasantries. This friend had a good heart, was kind, generous, and had all the traits of what we traditionally refer to as "a good person", yet she had become so locked into the chains of her "negative pleasantries" that there was no turning her around.
The interesting thing is that she worked directly with Orlando for a period of about 5 years, and during that time she did come to see and realize that her negative pleasantries were essentially a habit - i.e., a program stuck in its own groove. THAT seemed to be the key more than anything - and for about a good two years, she actually did turn herself around, lost her hypochondriac manifestations, became healthy and even happy. The problem was MAINTENANCE! Once that program of negative pleasantries sets in, it becomes much easier to simply *allow* for THAT, than to attempt to MAINTAIN a more "positive" life. So in the long run, she dropped off of the path and went back to her woeful old self, but even THAT (which she called a "failure") seemed to hold some delight for her, as if she had proven herself right and she really was a "failure" after all. Validation of her worst fears, in other words.
Now, after some years in between, she is leaning toward the path again, but I have no reason to think she has really changed - for precisely the reasons you mention. Even though she reached that point which Tolle refers to as the shift from ego to awareness, she was never able to get a handle on maintaining that awareness at the level of do-ing, at the level of change. So, I would simply say that awareness in this case isn't sufficient, but has to be carried further into the invocation of the will to actually move the assemblage point away from its habitual settling places - i.e., comfort zones.
Keep your hands out for your friend, Della ... it takes some longer than others. If we become impatient with them, they sense this and fall back to old habits.
I read some of Tolle awhile back, and basically found him to be a bit too simplistic in his approach. Some would say, "But it IS that simple." Sure, on paper, it's very simple. But in practice, it's a commitment that carries far more weight than even marriage - and very few people are capable of making that kind of commitment, even to themselves.
Therein lies the beauty ... Simplicity. And your right, it's a huge commitment. Will everyone make it .... probably not, but I'm feeling more people than we may think, are ready. Planting a seed and nurturing it. Some sprout up fast, some grow slowly, others wither and die.
As with all things, of course, they key seems to reside in balance.
Yes! ... the state of just Being ... no negative, no positive .... perfect balance.
Page 100:
PRESENCE
"A woman in her thirties came to see me. As she greeted me, I could sense
the pain behind her polite and superficial smile. She started telling me her
story, and within one second her smile changed into a grimace of pain. Then,
she began to sob uncontrollably. She said she felt lonely and unfulfilled.
There was much anger and sadness. As a child she had been abused by a
physically violent father. I saw quickly that her pain was not caused by her
present life circumstances but by an extraordinarily heavy pain-body. Her
pain-body had become the filter through which she viewed her life situation.
She was not yet able to see the link between the emotional pain and her
thoughts, being completely identified with both. She could not yet see that
she was feeding the pain-body with her thoughts. In other words, she lived
with the burden of a deeply unhappy self. At some level, however, she must
have realized that her pain originated within herself, that she was a burden to
herself. She was ready to awaken, and this is why she had come.
I directed the focus of her attention to what she was feeling inside her
body and asked her to sense the emotion directly, instead of through the filter
of her unhappy thoughts, her unhappy story. She said she had come
expecting me to show her the way out of her unhappiness, not into it.
Reluctantly, however, she did what I asked her to do. Tears were rolling
down her face, her whole body was shaking. “At this moment, this is what
you feel.” I said. “There is nothing you can do about the fact that at this
moment this is what you feel. Now, instead of wanting this moment to be
different from the way it is, which adds more pain to the pain that is already
there, is it possible for you to completely accept that this is what you feel
right now?”
She was quiet for a moment. Suddenly she looked impatient, as if she
was about to get up, and said angrily, “No, I don't want to accept this.” “Who
is speaking?” I asked her. “You or the unhappiness in you? Can you see that
your unhappiness about being unhappy is just another layer of unhappiness?”
She became quiet again. “I am not asking you to do anything. All I'm asking
is that you find out whether it is possible for you to allow those feelings to be
there. In other words, and this may sound strange, if you don't mind being
unhappy, what happens to the unhappiness? Don't you want to find out?”
She looked puzzled briefly, and after a minute or so of sitting silently,
I suddenly noticed a significant shift in her energy field. She said, “This is
weird. I 'm still unhappy, but now there is space around it. It seems to matter
less.” This was the first time I heard somebody put it like that: There is space
around my unhappiness. That space, of course, comes when there is inner
acceptance of whatever you are experiencing in the present moment.
I didn't say much else, allowing her to be with the experience. Later
she came to understand that the moment she stopped identifying with the
feeling, the old painful emotion that lived in her, the moment she put her
attention on it directly without trying to resist it, it could no longer control
her thinking and so become mixed up with a mentally constructed story
called “The Unhappy Me.” Another dimension had come into her life that
transcended her personal past – the dimension of Presence. Since you cannot
be unhappy without an unhappy story, this was the end of her unhappiness. It
was also the beginning of the end of her pain-body. Emotion in itself is not
unhappiness. Only emotion plus an unhappy story is unhappiness.
When our session came to an end, it was fulfilling to know that I had
just witnessed the arising of Presence in another human being. The very
reason for our existence in human form is to bring that dimension of
consciousness into this world. I had also witnessed a diminishment of the
pain-body, not through fighting it but through bringing th light of
consciousness to it.
A few minutes after my visitor left, a friend arrived to drop something
off. As soon as she came into the room she said, “What happened here? The
energy feels heavy and murky. It almost makes me feel sick. You need to
open the windows, burn some incense.” I explained that I had just witnessed
a major release in someone with a very dense pain-body and that what she
felt must be some of the energy that was released during our session. My
friend, however, didn't want to stay and listen. She wanted to get away as
soon as possible.
I opened the windows and went out to have dinner at a small Indian
restaurant nearby. What happened there was a clear, further confirmation of
what I already know: That on some level, all seemingly individual human
pan-bodies are connected. Although the form this particular confirmation
took did come as a shock."