Soma

Resources => Pictures [Public] => Topic started by: tangerine dream on February 26, 2008, 06:18:01 AM

Title: Shining my own light
Post by: tangerine dream on February 26, 2008, 06:18:01 AM: Task for the moment...

Shine my own light, no matter what.

;D
Title: Re: Shining my own light
Post by: Jennifer- on February 26, 2008, 10:15:09 PM: Blessed Be. :-*
Title: Re: Shining my own light
Post by: tangerine dream on February 27, 2008, 10:50:11 PM: My mom found some old pics of me and sent them yesterday.

This is me and my Mom, I think I was about two. I don't remember a lot of my childhood, but I do remember this particular house. This is when a lot of weird things started happening to me, speaking with spirits etc. When I first started to recap and do soul retrievals and journies I came back to this place more than once.

(http://lrg.zorpia.com/0/4135/26465817.8d8975.jpg)

And this one is me and my Dad. I don't remember ever spending time wth him when I was small so this is interesting to see. Although, I do remember living in this house. This is when I had a lady friend that lived in my closet. I would talk to her every night before I went to sleep. She was small like a fairy, but chubby like a great-gramma. She'd tell me all kinds of things.

(http://lrg.zorpia.com/0/4135/26465774.19f1ed.jpg)

More after work..
This is a bit of a recap for me.
Title: Re: Shining my own light
Post by: tangerine dream on February 28, 2008, 07:27:41 AM: This is me and my little brother Shawn we must have been around 10 and 8.
This is right around the time I started thinking I was very fat and hated to get my picture taken. As you can see, I wasn't fat at all, and not nearly as hideous as I thought I looked for some reason. I had the idea that my face contorted and got all ugly when I smiled. To look at this picture now, I think I looked kind of cute. ::)

(http://lrg.zorpia.com/0/4135/26465796.016a39.jpg)

And this one is me and my little brother and my auntie, Donna. I was around 15 or 16 in this picture. Again I thought I was horribly fat and and weird looking when I smiled and still hated to get my picture taken.

(http://lrg.zorpia.com/0/4135/26465746.e95b58.jpg)
Title: Re: Shining my own light
Post by: Jennifer- on February 28, 2008, 09:12:20 AM: :) :) :) :-* :-*

Thank you for sharing these and your thoughts.. wonderful recap... You are bringing her back to life!
Title: Re: Shining my own light
Post by: nichi on February 29, 2008, 07:16:33 AM: I like your brother... :)

More, more, L! Lovin these! The light from you is so bright!
Title: Re: Shining my own light
Post by: nichi on February 29, 2008, 07:22:03 AM: Quote from: tangerine dream on February 27, 2008, 10:50:11 PM
(http://lrg.zorpia.com/0/4135/26465817.8d8975.jpg)

In the stories that I've remembered reading from your childhood, I've pictured paneling like this...
Title: Re: Shining my own light
Post by: Zamurito on February 29, 2008, 07:42:55 AM: Interesting as I picked up on the panneling as well....
Title: Re: Shining my own light
Post by: tangerine dream on March 01, 2008, 08:21:24 AM: This is me and my little brother, Shawn. Don't you love the purple bath tub? Gotta love the 70s hey?

(http://lrg.zorpia.com/0/4140/26496680.819f2d.jpg)

Shawn and I again. Looking at this picture I remember how much I loved my baby brother and how close we were. We were best friends pretty much our whole lives. I was very protective of him. At one point, when I was 16 and moved out of the house, he got a little mad at me for moving and leaving him there. But I brought him with me a few months later and he lived with me for many, many years throughout all the moves and different houses and cities.

(http://lrg.zorpia.com/0/4140/26496688.7b4178.jpg)
Title: Re: Shining my own light
Post by: tangerine dream on March 01, 2008, 10:14:33 AM: Juhani,

I had no specific intent as the recap was rather spontaneous upon viewing the pictures my Mom sent.
Now that I have started though it has been good to dislodge some previously stuck memories and as Jennifer so beautifully put it "Bring her back to life."
Feels like a reunion with old friends. You know?
Title: Bring her back to life
Post by: tangerine dream on March 01, 2008, 04:25:37 PM: Bring me back to life...

(http://org36.zorpia.com/0/4141/26505055.fbebd1.jpg)

Wake me up inside
Title: Re: Shining my own light
Post by: Jennifer- on March 01, 2008, 10:28:20 PM: Juhani you make me laugh sometimes as you seem to come across with such rigidness..

If Lori goes back to places in her childhood and sees she misplaced energy by creating things.. like being over weight or ugly..by seeing what is.. or what truely was.. a beautiful young lady.. isnt that what recap is..

By seeing how beautiful she is, by exploring her happiness.. aliveness.. she can also see that much of her life has been lived in the shadow of her pain thus freeing herself from her past.. and finding a whole new little shiney person inside.

Why couldnt it be recap.. reunion.. all of it?

Not meaning to poke.. just curious why you felt it other then a recap, or what do you consider recap?
Title: Re: Shining my own light
Post by: erik on March 02, 2008, 01:06:47 AM: Yes, certainly, going through the past, re-awakening memories associated with various people are connected to the recap.

I'm not questioning the validity of the process Lori does here. It is ok and, actually, quite necessary to look into the early years before many memories and experiences were created. To remember the feeling - and then see how and in what ways experiences have had their effect. Acceptance, forgiveness, warmth - they all accompany the process of recap.
Title: Re: Shining my own light
Post by: Jennifer- on March 02, 2008, 01:24:23 AM: I understand...

And its key to remember that once the process has been taken to embrace the change of reawakening and move on without the old attachments completely. It can be quite a hard thing to do really.. the habitual nature of our being is to remain in the cozy arms of the shadow instead of moving forward into the light.

Thanks for your clarity Juhani :-*
Title: Re: Shining my own light
Post by: tangerine dream on March 02, 2008, 02:53:12 AM: Quote from: Raven on March 01, 2008, 10:28:20 PM
Juhani you make me laugh sometimes as you seem to come across with such rigidness..

If Lori goes back to places in her childhood and sees she misplaced energy by creating things.. like being over weight or ugly..by seeing what is.. or what truely was.. a beautiful young lady.. isnt that what recap is..

By seeing how beautiful she is, by exploring her happiness.. aliveness.. she can also see that much of her life has been lived in the shadow of her pain thus freeing herself from her past.. and finding a whole new little shiney person inside.

Why couldnt it be recap.. reunion.. all of it?

Not meaning to poke.. just curious why you felt it other then a recap, or what do you consider recap?

Thank you, Jennifer
I couldn't have said it better, myself!
Love you
Title: Re: Bring her back to life
Post by: tangerine dream on March 02, 2008, 02:55:49 AM: Quote from: tangerine dream on March 01, 2008, 04:25:37 PM

Bring me back to life...

(http://org36.zorpia.com/0/4141/26505055.fbebd1.jpg)

Wake me up inside

And then I got this in my email inbox this morning:
So perfect!

Quote

Real peace is born within each child, and that child is within you. Wake it up.
Title: the mirror
Post by: tangerine dream on March 02, 2008, 03:49:14 AM: My daughter, Cassidee has a talking doll. She talks a lot. This morning she wanted to tell me a secret. So the little dollie whispered in my ear, just now "Looking in the mirror is fun! Can we look together? I think you’re really really pretty!'

Spooky hey?
lol Spirit ::)
Title: Re: Shining my own light
Post by: tangerine dream on March 02, 2008, 04:51:20 AM: Quote from: Juhani on March 01, 2008, 05:56:49 PM
Yes, that is how it felt, but is it a recap?
If it is reunion and introducing them to us, then let it be reunion and introducing.

I was in the shower contemplating, I do a lot of that in the shower, and trying to decide whether or not to reply to you, Juhani. I considered not, figuring that I didn't want to offend anyone or seem like I was arguing with you. Then I weighed the whole throat chakra issue and decided that I had better say something, you know. And just then I heard a loud crash in my bathroom and realized something had fallen over. So I took that as a sign to say something. But what would I say. I went over in my head several different ways to say what I felt I needed to say, but without getting offended or taking anything personally. As I got out of the shower, I saw that what had fallen down was a bottle of room spray. It had toppled over onto a candle which had upset some shells. This caused The candle to fall on the floor and the shells in the toilet. So i worked on the symbology of it all, trying to decide what to say and how. Having figured that the candle represented fire and the shell, water which I equate to emotion I decided that my response should be un-emotional and that I should try not to let my emotions rule my life. Heh.
Just as I thought I had figured out what to say, I heard a loud voice say to me "Rules are for stalkers."

I had to laugh.
Thank you Spirit!
Title: Re: Shining my own light
Post by: erik on March 02, 2008, 05:51:41 AM: Don't get me wrong, Lori, I'm not disapproving your actions, nor criticising. You seek acceptance and confirmation that there is light in you, while you try to recover from these latest experiences. It is all fine and good. There is light in you and I have no problems with acceptance either. You are most welcome to share and exchange your thoughts here.

But you know yourself that knowledge and assurances that there is light in you are not quite enough.

You can say that 'rules are for stalkers'. Yet this statement does not undo the fact that growth processes can be very demanding.
Title: Re: Shining my own light
Post by: tangerine dream on March 02, 2008, 02:42:12 PM: Quote from: Juhani on March 02, 2008, 05:51:41 AM
You seek acceptance and confirmation that there is light in you, while you try to recover from these latest experiences.

I do not seek confirmation or acceptance Juhani. What I am doing is realising these things for myself and sharing these realisations with friends here at Soma who have been very big supports for me, both lately and in the past.

Quote
You can say that 'rules are for stalkers'. Yet this statement does not undo the fact that growth processes can be very demanding.

Juhani,
For the record, I didn't say "Rules are for Stalkers. I believe it was Michael who originally said it, I just borrowed it. However, today when I heard it, it was a voice from somewhere out there. :P
I agree that growth processes can be very demanding. I feel like the past year and a half has been a period of immense growth and learning for me. Now I am relaxing, resting, healing and clearing. Sitting back and letting the effects of the 'growth process' kick in.

Thanks for your input.
Title: Re: Shining my own light
Post by: Jahn on March 02, 2008, 08:36:26 PM: Quote from: tangerine dream on March 02, 2008, 02:42:12 PM
I agree that growth processes can be very demanding. I feel like the past year and a half has been a period of immense growth and learning for me. Now I am relaxing, resting, healing and clearing. Sitting back and letting the effects of the 'growth process' kick in.

That is a natural step. In the old days I used to call that part of the cycle for "Solidification" and I don't even know if there is such a word but the meaning is clear. After a tough period of demanding work it is important to solidify our being.

Q'eros - The Incas in Peru - talk baout the cycle in terms of "Paaaa" and "Cha!"where Paaa is the passive part and Cha is the active part. After activity comes passitivity. Remember Castanedas ups and downs. He was very physical in the lessons, Don Juan pushed him like nobody else and the result was exhausting. Castaneda became almost lethargic for several days after the encounters with Don Juan and his Warriors. "It took months for me to fully come around" he said regarding the sessions with Mescalito. Not to mention his fight with Dona Soledad and the two little sisters.
Title: Re: Shining my own light
Post by: Michael on March 02, 2008, 09:47:20 PM: I like your mum's glasses.
Title: Re: Shining my own light
Post by: tangerine dream on March 03, 2008, 08:25:36 AM: And thank you for the same ;D