Soma
Tools of the Path => Toltec [Public] => Topic started by: Firestarter on August 14, 2009, 07:15:55 AM
-
From Active Side of Infinity:
I didn't resolve anything," he declared. "It, the conflict or whatever, was the result of the battle between my two minds. Every one of us human beings has two minds. One is totally ours, and it is like a faint voice that always brings us order, directness, purpose. The other mind is a foreign installation. It brings us conflict, self-assertion, doubts, hopelessness."
My fixation on my own mental concatenations was so intense that I completely missed what don Juan had said. I could clearly
remember every one of his words, but they had no meaning for me. Don Juan very calmly, and looking directly into my eyes, repeated what he had just said. 1 was still incapable of grasping what he meant. 1 couldn't focus my attention on his words.
"For some strange reason, don Juan, I can't concentrate on what you're telling me," I said.
"1 understand perfectly why you can't," he said, smiling expansively, "and so will you, someday, at the same time that you resolve the conflict of whether you like me or not, the day you cease to be the me-me center of the world.
"In the meantime," he continued, "let's put the topic of our two minds aside and go back to the idea of preparing your album of memorable events. I should add that such an album is an exercise in discipline and impartiality. Consider this album to be an act of war."
Don Juan's assertion-that my conflict of both liking and not liking to see him was going to end whenever I abandoned my egocentrism-was no solution for me. In fact, that assertion made me angrier; it frustrated me all the more. And when 1 heard don Juan speak of the album as an act of war, I lashed out at him with all my poison.
"The idea that this is a collection of events is already hard to understand," I said in a tone of protest. "But that on top of all this, you call it an album and say that such an album is an act of war is too much for me. It's too obscure. Being obscure makes the metaphor lose its meaning."
"How strange! It's the opposite for me," don Juan replied calmly. "Such an album being an act of war has all the meaning in the world for me. I wouldn't like my album of memorable events to be anything but an act of war."
I wanted to argue my point further and explain to him that I did understand the idea of an album of memorable events. I objected to the perplexing way he was describing it. I thought of myself in those days as an advocate of clarity and functionalism in the use of language.
Don Juan didn't comment on my belligerent mood. He only shook his head as if he were fully agreeing with me. After a
while, I either completely ran out of energy, or I got a gigantic surge of it. All of a sudden, without any effort on my part, I realized the futility of my outbursts. I felt embarrassed no end.
"What possesses me to act the way I do?" I asked don Juan in earnest. I was, at that instant, utterly baffled. I was so shaken by my realization that without any volition on my part, I began to weep.
"Don't worry about stupid details," don Juan said reassuringly. "Every one of us, male and female, is like this."
"Do you mean, don Juan, that we are naturally petty and contradictory?"
"No, we are not naturally petty and contradictory," he replied. "Our pettiness and contradictions are, rather, the result of a transcendental conflict that afflicts every one of us, but of which only sorcerers are painfully and hopelessly aware: the conflict of our two minds."
Don Juan peered at me; his eyes were like two black charcoals.
"You've been telling me on and on about our two minds," I said, "but my brain can't register what you are saying. Why?"
"You'll get to know why in due time," he said. "For the present, it will be sufficient that I repeat to you what I have said before about our two minds. One is our true mind, the product of all our life experiences, the one that rarely speaks because it has been defeated and relegated to obscurity. The other, the mind we use daily for everything we do, is a foreign installation."
"I think that the crux of the matter is that the concept of the mind being a foreign installation is so outlandish that my mind refuses to take it seriously," I said, feeling that I had made a real discovery.
Don Juan did not comment on what 1 had said. He continued explaining the issue of the two minds as if I hadn't said a word.
"To resolve the conflict of the two minds is a matter of intending it," he said. "Sorcerers beckon intent by voicing the word intent loud and clear. Intent is a force that exists in the universe. When sorcerers beckon intent, it comes to them and sets up the path for attainment, which means that sorcerers always accomplish what they set out to do."
"Do you mean, don Juan, that sorcerers get anything they want, even if it is something petty and arbitrary?" I asked.
"No, I didn't mean that. Intent can be called, of course, for anything," he replied, "but sorcerers have found out, the hard way, that intent comes to them only for something that is abstract. That's the safety valve for sorcerers; otherwise they would be unbearable. In your case, beckoning intent to resolve the conflict of your two minds, or to hear the voice of your true mind, is not a petty or arbitrary matter. Quite the contrary; it is ethereal and abstract, and yet as vital to you as anything can be."
Don Juan paused for a moment; then he began to talk again about the album.
"My own album, being an act of war, demanded a super-careful selection," he said. "It is now a precise collection of the unforgetable moments of my life, and everything that led me to them. I have concentrated in it what has been and will be meaningful to me. In my opinion, a warrior's album is something most concrete, something so to the point that it is shattering."
I had no clue as to what don Juan wanted, and yet I did understand him to perfection. He advised me to sit down, alone, and let my thoughts, memories, and ideas come to me freely. He recommended that I make an effort to let the voice from the depths of me speak out and tell me what to select. Don Juan told me then to go inside the house and lie down on a bed that I had there. It was made of wooden boxes and dozens of empty burlap sacks that served as a mattress. My whole body ached, and when I lay on the bed it was actually extremely comfortable.
I took his suggestions to heart and began to think about my past, looking for events that had left a mark on me. I soon realized that my assertion that every event in my life had been meaningful was nonsense. As I pressed myself to recollect, I
found that I didn't even know where to start. Through my mind ran endless disassociated thoughts and memories of events that had happened to me, but I couldn't decide whether or not they had had any meaning for me. The impression I got was that nothing had had any significance whatsoever. It looked as if I had gone through life like a corpse empowered to walk and talk, but not to feel anything. Having no concentration whatsoever to pursue the subject beyond a shallow attempt, I gave up and fell asleep.
"Did you have any success?" don Juan asked me when I woke up hours later.
Instead of being at ease after sleeping and resting, I was again moody and belligerent.
"No, I didn't have any success!" I barked.
"Did you hear that voice from the depths of you?" he asked.
"I think I did," I lied.
"What did it say to you?" he inquired in an urgent tone.
"I can't think of it, don Juan," I muttered.
"Ah, you are back in your daily mind," he said and patted me forcefully on the back. "Your daily mind has taken over again. Let's relax it by talking about your collection of memorable events. I should tell you that the selection of what to put in your album is not an easy matter. This is the reason I say that making this album is an act of war. You have to remake yourself ten times over in order to know what to select."
I clearly understood then, if only for a second, that I had two minds; however, the thought was so vague that I lost it instantly. What remained was just the sensation of an incapacity to fulfill don Juan's requirement. Instead of graciously accepting my incapacity, though, I allowed it to become a threatening affair. The driving force of my life, in those days, was to appear always in a good light. To be incompetent was the equivalent of being a loser, something that was thoroughly intolerable to me. Since I didn't know how to respond to the challenge don Juan was posing, I did the only thing I knew how to do: I got angry.
"I've got to think a great deal more about this, don Juan," I said. "I've got to give my mind some time to settle on the idea."
"Of course, of course," don Juan assured me. "Take all the time in the world, but hurry."
-
This is perhaps the most critical task.
I can't say how much in my daily life I encounter the Foreign Instillation. It is pervasive in the extreme, and leaves me feeling a stranger in a strange land. As I grow older, I actually find myself oddly lonely.
Ellen, it is incredible you post this, as you are in the worst category.
But you are not there alone.
I have spoken before about this album, under a different name, and no one understood what I was talking about. It is such a fantastically good idea - everyone here should have this, and update it nightly!
So much that has happened here in Soma in the last week has been this battle between the two minds.
To tell the truth, which I abhor doing, I am utterly sick and tired of talking to people's Foreign Instillations. I don't say so - either here or in my life - else I would unleash a tidal wave of years of outrage.
"a faint voice that always brings us order, directness, purpose... our true mind, the product of all our life experiences, the one that rarely speaks because it has been defeated and relegated to obscurity"
"brings us conflict, self-assertion, doubts, hopelessness."
"Sorcerers beckon intent by voicing the word intent loud and clear"
Please everyone ... read this extract again, and go away and do it. Then come back and see what is happening here in Soma. See the task and the door - a major threshold is on offer: the turning point of all our lives.
-
"a faint voice that always brings us order, directness, purpose... our true mind, the product of all our life experiences, the one that rarely speaks because it has been defeated and relegated to obscurity"
"brings us conflict, self-assertion, doubts, hopelessness."
"Sorcerers beckon intent by voicing the word intent loud and clear"
8)
-
Doesn't the collection of these crucial events change with passing time - as if below layers there are layers with different turning points? Watching myself, I'd say that it is a continuous process. Looking at one's life with a changed perception shows it differently.
-
This is perhaps the most critical task.
I can't say how much in my daily life I encounter the Foreign Instillation. It is pervasive in the extreme, and leaves me feeling a stranger in a strange land. As I grow older, I actually find myself oddly lonely.
I was saying precisely the same thing to Wendy just a couple of days ago. Stranger in a strange land. Alien in the attic. Seems to go with the territory for anyone who has been on the path for any length of time. And definitely gets more pronounced as a get older. Thing is... I don't feel it as a "bad" thing, nor as a "good" thing. Seems to be the actual tightrope between the two minds.
To tell the truth, which I abhor doing, I am utterly sick and tired of talking to people's Foreign Instillations. I don't say so - either here or in my life - else I would unleash a tidal wave of years of outrage.
Heh. To tell the truth (which I don't often do with regard to this subject) this is precisely why I am accused of being "angry" from time to time, even and perhaps especially with my "students" (for lack of any better word). People claim to want "knowledge" but what they really want is entertainment or, worse, validation for their weaknesses & permission to carry on with their comfort zones - because for the most part they are still deeply rooted to the foreign installation, and through that root they are fed the rhetoric of the consensus 24/7, and so all we EVER really do is talk to their foreign installation.
It's a losing battle to approach it head on, as you obviously know. But on the other hand, I've found that subtlty works best when dealing with other wo/men of Knowledge. It's lost entirely on anyone else, because their foreign installation is so adept at filtering out any subtle lessons and replacing them with its own rhetoric. So even though I've caught flack plenty of times for it, I tend to speak plainly and directly even if it might offend the delicate sensibilities of those around me. *shrugs*
"a faint voice that always brings us order, directness, purpose... our true mind, the product of all our life experiences, the one that rarely speaks because it has been defeated and relegated to obscurity"
"brings us conflict, self-assertion, doubts, hopelessness."
"Sorcerers beckon intent by voicing the word intent loud and clear"
Please everyone ... read this extract again, and go away and do it. Then come back and see what is happening here in Soma. See the task and the door - a major threshold is on offer: the turning point of all our lives.
Okay... what I'm getting at here is that I think perhaps the time has come to spill the beans, Michael. :o Like I said, subtlty is all fine and good at times, but not so good at others. If you see something happening here in Soma that represents a door and a major threshold, "the turning point of all our lives"... I for one would be very interested in what you are *seeing*. I have my own ideas, of course, and my own pathway to freedom; but if there is to be a real unity of purpose, it would seem reasonable to suggest that we put some of those ideas on the table of the tonal just to bring them into the light.
Just curious as to where you see all of this going. The clock is ticking. Death is stalking us. Now what?
;) I'll show you mine if you'll show me yours. ;)
-
This is a topic about the foreign installation not about me. Digs at me are unnecessary.
This is perhaps the most critical task.
I can't say how much in my daily life I encounter the Foreign Instillation. It is pervasive in the extreme, and leaves me feeling a stranger in a strange land. As I grow older, I actually find myself oddly lonely.
Ellen, it is incredible you post this, as you are in the worst category.
But you are not there alone.
I have spoken before about this album, under a different name, and no one understood what I was talking about. It is such a fantastically good idea - everyone here should have this, and update it nightly!
So much that has happened here in Soma in the last week has been this battle between the two minds.
To tell the truth, which I abhor doing, I am utterly sick and tired of talking to people's Foreign Instillations. I don't say so - either here or in my life - else I would unleash a tidal wave of years of outrage.
"a faint voice that always brings us order, directness, purpose... our true mind, the product of all our life experiences, the one that rarely speaks because it has been defeated and relegated to obscurity"
"brings us conflict, self-assertion, doubts, hopelessness."
"Sorcerers beckon intent by voicing the word intent loud and clear"
Please everyone ... read this extract again, and go away and do it. Then come back and see what is happening here in Soma. See the task and the door - a major threshold is on offer: the turning point of all our lives.
-
Okay... what I'm getting at here is that I think perhaps the time has come to spill the beans, Michael. :o Like I said, subtlty is all fine and good at times, but not so good at others. If you see something happening here in Soma that represents a door and a major threshold, "the turning point of all our lives"... I for one would be very interested in what you are *seeing*. I have my own ideas, of course, and my own pathway to freedom; but if there is to be a real unity of purpose, it would seem reasonable to suggest that we put some of those ideas on the table of the tonal just to bring them into the light.
Just curious as to where you see all of this going. The clock is ticking. Death is stalking us. Now what?
;) I'll show you mine if you'll show me yours. ;)
*Kicks back with a cuppa.*
Well, we'll see what he responds with. This could be an interesting discussion, or if he goes the 'mystery man' route, and takes off. I think per the FI topic and him knowng how important it is, he'll probably say something.
Good discussion D :)
-
The driving force of my life, in those days, was to appear always in a good light. To be incompetent was the equivalent of being a loser, something that was thoroughly intolerable to me. Since I didn't know how to respond to the challenge don Juan was posing, I did the only thing I knew how to do: I got angry.
"I've got to think a great deal more about this, don Juan," I said. "I've got to give my mind some time to settle on the idea."
"Of course, of course," don Juan assured me. "Take all the time in the world, but hurry."
We in Toltec School talk about the Parasite, the inventory and the subconscious ruling our emotional state and re-actions, and we talk about authentic self, action with intent and sound choices together with alignment with the Nagual and our Dreamer being the opposite to the constructed ego's irregular suggestions.
-
The last statement in this exerpt, I ended it there with intent cause of what he said
Take all the time in the world... but hurry.
You cant miss what he was trying to convey with that one. Thats actually the best part of the whole exerpt.
-
Okay... what I'm getting at here is that I think perhaps the time has come to spill the beans, Michael. :o Like I said, subtlty is all fine and good at times, but not so good at others. If you see something happening here in Soma that represents a door and a major threshold, "the turning point of all our lives"... I for one would be very interested in what you are *seeing*.
One of the things I love so much about Michael, (though it used to drive me bonkers!!) is that he's adept at telling you everything you need to know without actually saying it. It's a great talent. One that I, myself hope to have one day.
-
One of the things I love so much about Michael, (though it used to drive me bonkers!!) is that he's adept at telling you everything you need to know without actually saying it. It's a great talent. One that I, myself hope to have one day.
LOL I second that! Even tho he irked me on his comment, I still love him for the same odd traits. Its just the way he is. Though I do admit I prefer words, one thing about having to say, communicate that way, you're left to interpret various energies and the like. Read it. Which is what I find myself having to do continually with him, lol
-
One of the things I love so much about Michael, (though it used to drive me bonkers!!) is that he's adept at telling you everything you need to know without actually saying it. It's a great talent. One that I, myself hope to have one day.
Lemme add onto that Lor, now Im on lunch I have more time. Della did catch it in her net, she stalked the statement out. What is this 'threshold' MM is speaking about? And, Im catching something (regardless to his dig), there is a reason of Spirit, that the FI topic has come up. Della is going with the flow of it, and all of it, even the drama of the last week, has garnered, flowed, right into the Heart of the FI for a REASON. I do not lack one thing, in one way, and that is being able to feel out, when a tide turns, and when something is approaching, anymore than I lack the sensitivities to the cosmos being an astrologer (which reminds me, I should probably check my lucky stars). If I stand back, allowing my observer to just look, and shutup mind, I too, like Della, feel something is afoot. I am not saying its even Michael's doing, but it is something. And who knows, perhaps soma will be able to pick itself up on two legs and walk right thru the Cosmic Vagina, lol. But something is afoot, is my point. As all rivers flow into One, all has flowed right here, for a reason. I think its time to do a little more one-to-one combat with Maya, IMO.
In addition on my lunch walk, interesting as I have a bee deal, a bee flew right at my left eye. Luckily I had my glasses on. He bumped into my eye, and only the glass shielded me from him, or her. It was quite the starteler. lol. A bee. They're very nagualesque for me when they aim at me. I think it was telling me to look at something myself. Course, I am less than two weeks away from a trying day in court and Ive been doing what i can on those walks to extract all the personal power I can to prepare for it. Playing certain scenarios in my mind, so I can be prepared for what they throw at me, say about me and the like. "See in advance," and use those skills cause just cause I have an atty doesnt mean he'll see it coming, but i may.
-
Lemme add onto that Lor, now Im on lunch I have more time. Della did catch it in her net, she stalked the statement out. What is this 'threshold' MM is speaking about? And, Im catching something (regardless to his dig), there is a reason of Spirit, that the FI topic has come up. Della is going with the flow of it, and all of it, even the drama of the last week, has garnered, flowed, right into the Heart of the FI for a REASON. I do not lack one thing, in one way, and that is being able to feel out, when a tide turns, and when something is approaching, anymore than I lack the sensitivities to the cosmos being an astrologer (which reminds me, I should probably check my lucky stars). If I stand back, allowing my observer to just look, and shutup mind, I too, like Della, feel something is afoot. I am not saying its even Michael's doing, but it is something. And who knows, perhaps soma will be able to pick itself up on two legs and walk right thru the Cosmic Vagina, lol. But something is afoot, is my point. As all rivers flow into One, all has flowed right here, for a reason. I think its time to do a little more one-to-one combat with Maya, IMO.
Certainly didn't mean to give the impression that Della didn't catch something, nor did I imply that nothing was 'afoot'. Just highlighting something I admire in Michael.
-
There is a threshold that once crossed permits no retreat,” he said. “Ordinarily, from the moment the spirit knocks, it is years before an apprentice reaches that threshold. Sometimes, though, the threshold is reached almost immediately. My benefactor’s case is an example.”
Don Juan said every sorcerer should have a clear memory of crossing that threshold so he could remind himself of the new state of his perceptual potential. He explained that one did not have to be an apprentice of sorcery to reach this threshold, and that the only difference between an average man and a sorcerer, in such cases, is what each emphasizes. A sorcerer emphasizes crossing this threshold and uses the memory of it as a point of reference. An average man does not cross the threshold and does his best to forget all about it.
I told him that I did not agree with his point, because I could not accept that there was only one threshold to cross.
Don Juan looked heavenward in dismay and shook his head in a joking gesture of despair. I proceeded with my argument, not to disagree with him, but to clarify things in my mind. Yet I quickly lost my impetus. Suddenly I had the feeling I was sliding through a tunnel.
“Sorcerers say that the fourth abstract core happens when the spirit cuts our chains of self-reflection,” he said. “Cutting our chains is marvelous, but also very undesirible, for nobody wants to be free.”
PoS
Nobody wants to be free....
Hmmm....
-
Certainly didn't mean to give the impression that Della didn't catch something, nor did I imply that nothing was 'afoot'. Just highlighting something I admire in Michael.
You didnt at all. I didnt get that impression from your post. Thats not why I chose to reply to you. But you did mention, as della, how he does communicate in subtle ways, not directly, which della was discussing a bit (hell that could spawn a whole nother topic)! Like I am more blunt, I choose words typically. I can put energy behind my words, I can do it in silence too, but words seem to be the easier method, though I admit, they do lack a perfection that energy can convey esp when dealing with the abstract. It really depends but in here, esp cause I type, I tend to use words.
I think if anything, much of where things can get muddled is when we misinterpret energy behind words. Or intent behind words, if you will. Ive seen that on various occasions, so I try to utilize words instead, in hopes nothing will be mistaken in what im trying to convey. But alas, doesnt always work that way.
Just some rambles before i clock back in :)
-
even the drama of the last week, has garnered, flowed, right into the Heart of the FI for a REASON.
And who knows, perhaps soma will be able to pick itself up on two legs and walk right thru the Cosmic Vagina, lol.
So that there would be no talking things into an 'acceptable form' - the drama was clearly initiated by one person and there is nothing wrong, nor has been wrong with Soma. This is a very personal message to you, Ellen - don't try to put a spin of acceptability on these events. The fact that we keep talking here does not make certain actions or statements any more acceptable.
-
So that there would be no talking things into an 'acceptable form' - the drama was clearly initiated by one person and there is nothing wrong, nor has been wrong with Soma. This is a personal message to you, Ellen - don't try to put a spin of acceptability on these events. The fact that we keep talking here does not make certain actions or statements any more acceptable.
Im sorry Juhani, but I have already told Michael I will not be arguing with folks, and this thread will not be going off topic by myself. I am entitled to my observations, as you are yours, and right now soma is dealing with the foreign installation. Michael said to read the exerpt, then go look out into the world. That is what I intend to do, as I am also looking at what transpired and why things went the way they did.
Now if you shall excuse me....
-
Yes, by all means, deal with what you see appropriate, but please remember where the thin line cutting off unacceptable is.
-
Yes, by all means, deal with what you see appropriate, but please remember where the thin line cutting off unacceptable is.
Am I excused Juhani, or do you need to PM me and take it there? Cause I already said, im only discussing foreign installation and how it may relate to us in soma and the 'threshold.'
-
Am I excused Juhani, or do you need to PM me and take it there? Cause I already said, im only discussing foreign installation and how it may relate to us in soma and the 'threshold.'
This a suggestion only - try to change your angle of approach to issue from trying to deal with 'all of us in Soma' to looking at yourself personally and dealing with installation in you. It is a purely personal matter for each of us.
-
This a suggestion only - try to change your angle of approach to issue from trying to deal with 'all of us in Soma' to looking at yourself personally and dealing with installation in you. It is a purely personal matter for each of us.
We are dealing with foreign installation and the threshold, not 'me' Juhani. Now, this is what Im gonna do. Im gonna pm you, and there we can act like an old married couple so you can get your rocks off for the day. Til then, I will not allow you - on this thread - to cause me to engage, considering I told michael I will be dissassociating myself from folks at soma who do not have my best interest.
-
One of the things I love so much about Michael, (though it used to drive me bonkers!!) is that he's adept at telling you everything you need to know without actually saying it. It's a great talent. One that I, myself hope to have one day.
Yes, certainly an excellent quality. However, my point was that if something is of such vital importance, how long is it reasonable to take that more subtle approach? If the house is on fire or the wolves are at the door, subtlty then becomes a form of patience no one can really afford. (No disrespect to Michael intended).
Also, keep in mind that sometimes it's up to you (generic) to ask questions that might facilitate an answer. Otherwise, most wo/men of knowledge I know figure your silence indicates a satisfaction with where you are. We are all active participants in our own evolution - waiting for someone to tell you (or not) what to do or not-do is just another form of following - again, no disrespect intended.
If you think someone else has Knowledge or information you need, the only way to be sure is to ask. The worst they can do is say no.
But, then again, I'm much more direct. Neither here nor there, just a predilection. :)
-
But, then again, I'm much more direct. Neither here nor there, just a predilection. :)
Yay! Im not the only one! (LOL just kidding).
-
Yes, certainly an excellent quality. However, my point was that if something is of such vital importance, how long is it reasonable to take that more subtle approach? If the house is on fire or the wolves are at the door, subtlty then becomes a form of patience no one can really afford. (No disrespect to Michael intended).
Like don Juan says -- We have no time for impatience. ;)
~
In the case when the wolf is at the door, it is my responsibility to listen to what Michael has been saying all along and figure out where to go from there.
Hopefully something will click and I will do what needs to be done.
Thing is, when the wolf is at the door, we usually tend to act from a place directly connected with Spirit rather than the foreign installation.
-
There are predilections among naguals as well: some talk a lot (DJ described himself that way), others simply and mercilessly put you through experiences and leave surviving, comprehending and assimilating them to you (Julian, teacher of Miguel Ruiz), some are outright weird (Elias).
-
I think if anything, much of where things can get muddled is when we misinterpret energy behind words. Or intent behind words, if you will. Ive seen that on various occasions, so I try to utilize words instead, in hopes nothing will be mistaken in what im trying to convey. But alas, doesnt always work that way.
As I see it, really only the foreign installation can misinterpret the energy or intent behind words. It's what's it good at, to keep itself in the number 1 position. When we can recognize the speakings of our own foreign installation, is probably when we can see the door. Passing through it though, is another thing. The tug between the 2 minds. When we allow it, the foreign installation has no power. For me, it's a continual process, alertness and awareness every moment. It is so easy to sink into the comfort of the foreign installation. It validates everything. In a way, it's like whether we react, or chose to respond. Though that choice can only be in the moment. It is in the moment when we can either dump the foreign installation, or not. It's war.
-
There are predilections among naguals as well: some talk a lot (DJ described himself that way), others simply and mercilessly put you through experiences and leave surviving, comprehending and assimilating them to you (Julian, teacher of Miguel Ruiz), some are outright weird (Elias).
Would be nice to have something from all! Such a great balance! There is a time for talk, a time for doing, and a time when weirdness serves! In actuality, we are probably drawn to one type or another.
-
Had a cuppa tea and thought about this. Ellen is quite right. The foreign installation, and it's outcome, is in soma. The fact that we discussing it shows that.
Before I ever heard of the tern "foreign installation" I recognized it. Very easy to spot. I just asked myself, where did that thought come from. Terming it the foreign installation gives us a better hold on seeing it and so being able to do something about it.
Whether it came about from one person, or more, matters not. That it is here for discussion does.
For many years, I considered myself a fraud. Rather harshly in retrospect, though nevertheless true. It came about because I recognized utterances coming from a part of myself that somehow didn't ring true; true to me. Working on it was hard, and I am still working on it. It pervades everyday life. That is why I also enjoy my solitude so much. There is no place for the foreign installation in that. It needs others to feed it and in turn to feed them. It also is a part of our human form, hence the emphasis in Toltec of releasing the human form. And not only in Toltec, also in many other paths; though it goes by different names.
Here in soma. we follow different paths, each path is very individual to each of us, and indeed can only be so. Acceptance of others paths and ways, leads to a diminishing of the foreign installation's control. Acceptance though, has to be double sided. Without that we have conflict and end of any constructive discussion. Thing is, about discussions, that often they lead nowhere. They really are a platform for one to express their own views - as I am doing here. Nice for a while, though like anything that is not face-to-face, loses it's impact as time moves on and we have moved on to other aspects of our life, and have somehow lost the thread. That, personally is my own problem with discussion. There is only so much I can say. After that it becomes a repetition, like a stuck record that cannot move on. And move on is what I want.
We are at a threshold, how are we going to deal with it, and do we even know what that threshold is? I suppose, each of you, like myself, have our own thresholds which together make up soma at any one time.
-
Thanks Della, a good question, and it is timely a few words be spoken on this matter.
For most members of Soma, this is their primary sanctuary for sharing their real inner journey in this life. We have known each other now for years - the forum’s names change, but the association doesn’t much vary. We have our own personal topography of evolution in this life, but due to our association, there is an underlying group spirit that is influenced by and influences each of us.
We are arriving at a threshold. Individually that is at different stages, but due again to our association, that threshold is also embedded in the spirit of the group, currently that means Soma. Soma is experiencing a Kundalini event - for at least since the beginning of this year, I have been feeling the restless stirrings. In the last few months I have been feeling this more pronounced, and so I have been quietly seeding Soma with a few critical inputs.
There has been a suggestion that the occasional reduced intensity of posting and engagement in Soma is a sign of its impending demise. This is a superficial view. Soma like all agglomerations goes through tides of low and high intensity, which do not correlate with the relevance and significance of its deeper energetic flow. It does not mean that because many posts are firing, the quality of interaction is more significant. It does help the social side of Soma, but the true energetic tides often flow in quite different cycles - and these are commonly longer cycles.
My earlier comments in this thread were referring to specific events, and I am not going to tempt the gods by blabbing of these before they have fully manifested. That however does not preclude me from drawing attention to the astral energies at play here currently.
Many members are now experiencing critical thresholds in their own lives - either upcoming, in process or just passed. These personal thresholds are not only personal - each of us is energetically interwoven in the group spirit - our own struggles and arrivals feed in and are fed out of the group spirit. This means that we can not only draw support and shakti from the ‘peloton’ - the group spirit within Soma - but our personal efforts and achievements foster the peloton’s deeper transformations.
As a group, we have known each other for much longer than our current internet connection - it goes back beyond the physical. We are fast approaching a threshold which is critical for the work we are all doing internally - critical for this life. You can’t just create a group engaged in spirit development and not activate a deeper transformational process. That process has been activated and is now reaching the summit of watershed for the purpose of Soma in this life. How we negotiate this watershed is pivotal for our group’s purpose and our own purpose in this life.
The peloton is picking up speed - the inner impulse of transformation is bubbling and drawing closer to the surface. We are cycling past many on the road side who have ‘stood aside’ and given up the true fight for this life. They watch us as we speed by. We take the ‘point’ in turn - sharing the extra strain of shouldering the wind. Now it is time to awaken and invest the astral spirit of Soma with conscious vivification.
Imagine the Kundalini of Soma stirring and surging upwards. See the threshold like a summit on a long assent we have been climbing since we found each other. Look penetratingly with your astral eyes into the lower layers of Soma’s spirit and see what you can of its evolutionary surge. Thus merging your astral being with the astral being of our group’s purpose. Much shakti can be drawn down to assist our own threshold events through this. Use Soma as a common powerhouse to vitalise our own struggle and pending achievement.
There is one exercise that when done regularly, can assist this whole process. I will continue to seed the transformative energies as those seeds are passed to me, but we can each prepare ourselves and thus facilitate the advent of a task that we have come together in this life to enact. I am referring here to the Death Walk.
The Death Walk
You are on Death Row. the call comes through - you’re next. You stand up and walk slowly towards the door, knowing that behind that door, it all ends. How are you to walk?
Feel your double inside you, bent over and cramped within your tiny frame. Allow your double to unbend, feel it reaching up to its full height and power - feel its ownership of the situation - its rightful sovereignty. Walk forward deliberately, knowing this is your last walk, your last moments. This is your Death Walk.
Practice this walk whenever you can, until it becomes calm, natural and graceful.
But the best time to practice is when you have to break what you are doing to go to the toilet. Pissing and crapping are what we call inconvenient truths. Inconvenient because we want to get on with what we are doing, but instead we have to drop that and head of to the bathroom. That is how death also comes to us. So that is a perfect time to practice the Death Walk. There is nothing more truthful, interfering and mundane, than having to drop our activity, and head off to pinch a loaf ... or die.
Grasp the moment, acknowledge the call has come. Accept it - stand and walk with dignity and presence. Stop before the doorway, knowing that you will not come back through again. This is it.
Death in the astral means major change. That is what we are facing - what I have described above as the imminent threshold. The Death Walk is also our threshold walk. Nothing will be the same again. If we practice this walk, we prepare ourselves in the best way for a transformation that will launch us into a destiny selected long before we came to this moment, this life.
-
Thanks Della, a good question, and it is timely a few words be spoken on this matter.
For most members of Soma, this is their primary sanctuary for sharing their real inner journey in this life. We have know each other now for years - the forum’s names change, but the association doesn’t much vary. We have our own personal topography of evolution in this life, but due to our association, there is an underlying group spirit that is influenced by and influences each of us.
We are arriving at a threshold. Individually that is at different stages, but due again to our association, that threshold is also embedded in the spirit of the group, currently that means Soma. Soma is experiencing a Kundalini event - for at least since the beginning of this year, I have been feeling the restless stirrings. In the last few months I have been feeling this more pronounced, and so I have been quietly seeding Soma with a few critical inputs.
There has been a suggestion that the occasional reduced intensity of posting and engagement in Soma is a sign of its impending demise. This is a superficial view. Soma like all agglomerations goes through tides of low and high intensity, which do not correlate with the relevance and significance of its deeper energetic flow. It does not mean that because many posts are firing, the quality of interaction is more significant. It does help the social side of Soma, but the true energetic tides often flow in quite different cycles - and these are commonly longer cycles.
My earlier comments in this thread were referring to specific events, and I am not going to tempt the gods by blabbing of these before they have fully manifested. That however does not preclude me from drawing attention to the astral energies at play here currently.
Many members are now experiencing critical thresholds in their own lives - either upcoming, in process or just passed. These personal thresholds are not only personal - each of us is energetically interwoven in the group spirit - our own struggles and arrivals feed in and are fed out of the group spirit. This means that we can not only draw support and shakti from the ‘peloton’ - the group spirit within Soma - but our personal efforts and achievements foster the peloton’s deeper transformations.
As a group, we have known each other for much longer than our current internet connection - it goes back beyond the physical. We are fast approaching a threshold which is critical for the work we are all doing internally - critical for this life. You can’t just create a group engaged in spirit development and not activate a deeper transformational process. That process has been activated and is now reaching the summit of watershed for the purpose of Soma in this life. How we negotiate this watershed is pivotal for our group’s purpose and our own purpose in this life.
The peloton is picking up speed - the inner impulse of transformation is bubbling and drawing closer to the surface. We are cycling past many on the road side who have ‘stood aside’ and given up the true fight for this life. They watch us as we speed by. We take the ‘point’ in turn - sharing the extra strain of shouldering the wind. Now it is time to awaken and invest the astral spirit of Soma with conscious vivification.
Imagine the Kundalini of Soma stirring and surging upwards. See the threshold like a summit on a long assent we have been climbing since we found each other. Look penetratingly with your astral eyes into the lower layers of Soma’s spirit and see what you can of its evolutionary surge. Thus merging your astral being with the astral being of our group’s purpose. Much shakti can be drawn down to assist our own threshold events through this. Use Soma as a common powerhouse to vitalise our own struggle and pending achievement.
There is one exercise that when done regularly, can assist this whole process. I will continue to seed the transformative energies as those seeds are passed to me, but we can each prepare ourselves and thus facilitate the advent of a task that we have come together in this life to enact. I am referring here to the Death Walk.
The Death Walk
You are on Death Row. the call comes through - you’re next. You stand up and walk slowly towards the door, knowing that behind that door, it all ends. How are you to walk?
Feel your double inside you, bent over and cramped within your tiny frame. Allow your double to unbend, feel it reaching up to its full height and power - feel its ownership of the situation - its rightful sovereignty. Walk forward deliberately, knowing this is your last walk, your last moments. This is your Death Walk.
Practice this walk whenever you can, until it becomes calm, natural and graceful.
But the best time to practice is when you have to break what you are doing to go to the toilet. Pissing and crapping are what we call inconvenient truths. Inconvenient because we want to get on with what we are doing, but instead we have to drop that and head of to the bathroom. That is how death also comes to us. So that is a perfect time to practice the Death Walk. There is nothing more truthful, interfering and mundane, than having to drop our activity, and head off to pinch a loaf ... or die.
Grasp the moment, acknowledge the call has come. Accept it - stand and walk with dignity and presence. Stop before the doorway, knowing that you will not come back through again. This is it.
Death in the astral means major change. That is what we are facing - what I have described above as the imminent threshold. The Death Walk is also our threshold walk. Nothing will be the same again. If we practice this walk, we prepare ourselves in the best way for a transformation that will launch us into a destiny selected long before we came to this moment, this life.
Thanks for the expansion, Michael. :) It gives me a better idea of what you are seeing, and when working in any type of group, I've found that having at least a vague idea of where that commonality of purpose lies is critical (at least for my own participation). I realize many (most) have been in Soma far longer than I - my path was in a different direction during the days of TNF - so in essence I don't share the "history" of the group and the only way to "get it" is to ask.
As for Soma going into decline... I never felt that to be the case, even though I did feel that Ellen's initial post in the thread had merit, based on my own experiences at The Shaman's Rattle (Delphi) and at The Sorcerer's World. When a group goes silent for long periods of time, it can mean many things, not all of them necessarily negative. But the end result seems to be that some members will stop coming altogether in the absence of activity, so while I can appreciate the value of silence, I also feel that forums are dependent on discussion to keep their members interested and focused. A double-edged sword there, of course. Not anyone's responsbility to generate or maintain another's interest; but OTOH, because we're spread out all over the world, it isn't like we get together every Friday night for tea & crumpets to renew and expand our connection. An amusing thought, actually - would be nice if that were the case. :D
-
There are predilections among naguals as well: some talk a lot (DJ described himself that way), others simply and mercilessly put you through experiences and leave surviving, comprehending and assimilating them to you (Julian, teacher of Miguel Ruiz), some are outright weird (Elias).
Ah, yes. Thanks for bringing this up, Juhani.
As I see it, really only the foreign installation can misinterpret the energy or intent behind words. It's what's it good at, to keep itself in the number 1 position.
Excellent point Daphne! :-*
I was thinking this, too. That the energy is usually easy to feel at first glance. Once we start thinking -- (and the foreign installation steps in) doubt and second guessing, among other things can occur.
The Death Walk
You are on Death Row. the call comes through - you’re next. You stand up and walk slowly towards the door, knowing that behind that door, it all ends. How are you to walk?
Feel your double inside you, bent over and cramped within your tiny frame. Allow your double to unbend, feel it reaching up to its full height and power - feel its ownership of the situation - its rightful sovereignty. Walk forward deliberately, knowing this is your last walk, your last moments. This is your Death Walk.
Practice this walk whenever you can, until it becomes calm, natural and graceful.
But the best time to practice is when you have to break what you are doing to go to the toilet. Pissing and crapping are what we call inconvenient truths. Inconvenient because we want to get on with what we are doing, but instead we have to drop that and head of to the bathroom. That is how death also comes to us. So that is a perfect time to practice the Death Walk. There is nothing more truthful, interfering and mundane, than having to drop our activity, and head off to pinch a loaf ... or die.
You crack me up, M. Thanks for the exercise.
And I apologize to all if I sounded a bit harsh last night. It just seems to me that M has already told us everything so many times over-- I guess I projected a little bit of my own dislike at repeating myself.
This toilet exercise, though is defintiely a NEW one!
-
Not anyone's responsbility to generate or maintain another's interest; but OTOH, because we're spread out all over the world, it isn't like we get together every Friday night for tea & crumpets to renew and expand our connection. An amusing thought, actually - would be nice if that were the case. :D
What a nice idea! May I have jam and cream with my crumpets? The last time I dropped in on your gathering was rather interesting for me. I'd like to do it again! :)
-
This toilet exercise, though is defintiely a NEW one!
Have some of my best insights there! ;)
-
The Death Walk
You are on Death Row. the call comes through - you’re next. You stand up and walk slowly towards the door, knowing that behind that door, it all ends. How are you to walk?
Feel your double inside you, bent over and cramped within your tiny frame. Allow your double to unbend, feel it reaching up to its full height and power - feel its ownership of the situation - its rightful sovereignty. Walk forward deliberately, knowing this is your last walk, your last moments. This is your Death Walk.
Practice this walk whenever you can, until it becomes calm, natural and graceful.
I've been attempting this for some time. Wanted to see where it would lead (from my experience while in hospital). I must admit though, that when I do it without the 'scene' I had, I can accept my 'last moments' etc. However, when I put myself back in the same place I found myself then, it is quite different, though the fear of 'forgetting' is lessening. That was my fear, for to me, the 'tolality' of the self would include all experiences, and in that particular experience, there was the fear of forgetting. Having looked at it somewhat, it is rather like what I imagine would happen should my awareness be 'devoured by the eagle'. The idea of bliss or nirvana at times makes me think of that, since there, there is no individual "I". And currently I am still rather attached to my "I" - it is what makes my awareness, conscious. Don't know what awareness without consciousness would be like.
-
When a group goes silent for long periods of time, it can mean many things, not all of them necessarily negative. But the end result seems to be that some members will stop coming altogether in the absence of activity, so while I can appreciate the value of silence, I also feel that forums are dependent on discussion to keep their members interested and focused. A double-edged sword there, of course.
I am trying really hard - a kind of not-doing for me! I prefer silence, though I also realize that with silence I may just go around in my own little head and get no-where! :D
-
What a nice idea! May I have jam and cream with my crumpets? The last time I dropped in on your gathering was rather interesting for me. I'd like to do it again! :)
That was indeed a very validating experience for both of us! Thanks for stopping by. :) (Yes, you may have as much cream as you like...)
*hugs*
D
-
The Death Walk
You are on Death Row. the call comes through - you’re next. You stand up and walk slowly towards the door, knowing that behind that door, it all ends. How are you to walk?
Feel your double inside you, bent over and cramped within your tiny frame. Allow your double to unbend, feel it reaching up to its full height and power - feel its ownership of the situation - its rightful sovereignty. Walk forward deliberately, knowing this is your last walk, your last moments. This is your Death Walk.
Practice this walk whenever you can, until it becomes calm, natural and graceful.
But the best time to practice is when you have to break what you are doing to go to the toilet. Pissing and crapping are what we call inconvenient truths. Inconvenient because we want to get on with what we are doing, but instead we have to drop that and head of to the bathroom. That is how death also comes to us. So that is a perfect time to practice the Death Walk. There is nothing more truthful, interfering and mundane, than having to drop our activity, and head off to pinch a loaf ... or die.
Grasp the moment, acknowledge the call has come. Accept it - stand and walk with dignity and presence. Stop before the doorway, knowing that you will not come back through again. This is it.
Death in the astral means major change. That is what we are facing - what I have described above as the imminent threshold. The Death Walk is also our threshold walk. Nothing will be the same again. If we practice this walk, we prepare ourselves in the best way for a transformation that will launch us into a destiny selected long before we came to this moment, this life.
Ive been doing something similar to this, though not entirely, on my walks for some time, walking thru the 'slit in the universe,' astrally to a different time. I see each walk and each slit as 'passing thru' another avenue which will help me accomplish some tough goals coming up ahead of me. Trying to make a miracle manifest.
-
I realize many (most) have been in Soma far longer than I - my path was in a different direction during the days of TNF - so in essence I don't share the "history" of the group and the only way to "get it" is to ask.
It's not about TNF or TSR or TSW, though -- the forums themselves are coincidental. Soma is the only "forum" which isn't coincidental in the scheme of things. The history goes back way farther than forums, if one wants to look at 'history' in terms of time.
M explained it here:
As a group, we have known each other for much longer than our current internet connection - it goes back beyond the physical. We are fast approaching a threshold which is critical for the work we are all doing internally - critical for this life. You can't just create a group engaged in spirit development and not activate a deeper transformational process. That process has been activated and is now reaching the summit of watershed for the purpose of Soma in this life. How we negotiate this watershed is pivotal for our group’s purpose and our own purpose in this life.
That connection beyond forums or the internet in my view is an apprehension of something transcendent: it is not merely a perception or a myth-creation. One would either grok it and feel it in one's bones or not. Myself, I felt it in my bones from the beginning of meeting Michael, Jahn, and Juhani. The location (TNF) was purely coincidental.
(It's a digression from the topic, but thought I'd come in to amplify the point.)
-
Id have to agree on that one with nichi, and I do recall when stumbling upon TNF having the same feelings about meeting the people in the place. It has been a challenge, however, and there is side dreaming no one really knows of, which I know of, and everyone has their own, but for myself I can only say I utilize those challenges in understanding any 'past' for 'now.' And right now Im simply trying to utilize soma, its undercurrent, for my upcoming task for now, something that I have no choice but to do. I do not know how it will serve me, until perhaps five months from now. I did have a recent K-dream so it makes some sense to me that Michael would mention the kundalini of soma, that seems to be more of a 'within' deal, or, within us. A way of group and individual connection within that we can utilize in the present. That posts its own set of challenges cause the serpent is tricky; I dont really care, I just care right now in utilizing what will work in my current task in life. I also need to measure that to remain balanced and cannot allow it to offset me.
-
Id have to agree on that one with nichi, and I do recall when stumbling upon TNF having the same feelings about meeting the people in the place. It has been a challenge, however, and there is side dreaming no one really knows of, which I know of, and everyone has their own, but for myself I can only say I utilize those challenges in understanding any 'past' for 'now.' And right now Im simply trying to utilize soma, its undercurrent, for my upcoming task for now, something that I have no choice but to do. I do not know how it will serve me, until perhaps five months from now. I did have a recent K-dream so it makes some sense to me that Michael would mention the kundalini of soma, that seems to be more of a 'within' deal, or, within us. A way of group and individual connection within that we can utilize in the present. That posts its own set of challenges cause the serpent is tricky; I dont really care, I just care right now in utilizing what will work in my current task in life. I also need to measure that to remain balanced and cannot allow it to offset me.
Good stalking, Ellen!