I know this is a funny place to put this subject, procrastination, in the Action board, but it felt right, for me.
In psychology, procrastination refers to the act of replacing high-priority actions with tasks of low-priority, and thus putting off important tasks to a later time. Psychologists often cite such behavior as a mechanism for coping with the anxiety associated with starting or completing any task or decision. Schraw, Wadkins, and Olafson have proposed three criteria for a behavior to be classified as procrastination: it must be counterproductive, needless, and delaying.
Procrastination may result in stress, a sense of guilt and crisis, severe loss of personal productivity, as well as social disapproval for not meeting responsibilities or commitments.
These feelings combined may promote further procrastination. While it is regarded as normal for people to procrastinate to some degree, it becomes a problem when it impedes normal functioning. Chronic procrastination may be a sign of an underlying psychological disorder.
I've been talking to a friend of mine this week, Michael, a guy I went to highschool with. We weren't the best of friends in high school, but in the last few years have gotten pretty close. We talk about a lot of deeply personal stuff.
So Michael, just finished college and is now licensed to be a pre-school teacher, a wonderful musician and all around nice guy has just discovered that he is a procrastinator. Apparently the realization and admitting to those he loves was pretty hard for him so he is struggling to work through this.
As we talked about it, I confessed to Michael that I have been struggling with a procrastination problem, as well. He seems surprised to hear this, though relieved that I truly understand him and I think this is the first time that I have actually admitted this to myself.
Well to make a long story short, I've been thinking and reading a lot about procrastination and see that it's something that a lot of people struggle with. It doesn't mean we are lazy, but it does mean that there is some sort of deep psychological reason that we choose to put tasks off -- indefinitely at times.
Certainly, I have been working on this for many years, particularly since having children and have gotten in to a point where I can deal with it and still get my tasks completed, mostly on time, but that doesn't stop the feelings or the absolute need to not do some thing even though I know I must.
I was out with my Mom today, we had a pretty good day. A real Mother-daughter bonding type of day, which, if you are familiar with my story at all, you will know is quite unusual. So it was a good day, it's nice to be finally getting along, but more than that, I really learned something about myself today.
It was during our shopping at the Farmer's Market. We had finished shopping had parcels in hand and my Mother wanted to get back to the car. So we began walking back. "Hurry up, get to the car" she said. And so I did. And when we got to the car "Hurry up and get in." I did. And when I was in the car "Hurry up and close the door." So I did. "put your seatbelt on." Quickly, I did.
At the moment I closed the car door in the parking lot of the Farmer's Market, all the pieces of the procrastination puzzle started coming together. I suddenly realized why I had grown into a procrastinator. I realized what I was protesting and struggling against. I realized then, as I was hurrying to close the door to please my Mother, who is always always in a rush to get things done and completed and in a hurry to get here and there and back again, I realized the source of my procrastination. It was, in my own small way, a protest against my mother. A protest against the hurry-ups and the get in the cars and the close your doors and the come here go there, hurry quick, quick, quicks that I had been fighting my whole entire life. I was protesting in the only way I knew how.
I'm not a hurrier. I never have been and my procrastination problem was my little way of saying "No! Not now. I don't want to hurry up! I don't want to do everything quick, quick, quick.
I want to take my time.
