quote author=nichi link=topic=110.msg3378#msg3378 date=1157131964]
lost in my search.
Me begging me
to raise the screen
by lifting up the veil,
for I was my only means to me.
Wouldn't ya know after lurking about for over two hours (my time ran out once already!) this would be the discussion that invites me.

I've read this morning about gloves being turned inside out, (that one does hit home - do I no longer fit the hand for which I was created?), about words (those who know me know my love/hate relationship there), and about belief systems.
I've been delighted to meet up with some old friends, and look forward to making new ones. Hi Todd, I feel your hand slip into mine once more. Vicki, your arms hold me close again, and Jen - we continue our flight together!
Two things - maybe three...
"lost in my search ... for I was my only means to me" I feel that to use someone else's ideas, definitions, or practices to find myself, is the surest way to become lost. I AM the only way to me.
"we manifest by our beliefs" and if I believe that I must search for me - I will always BE searching.
I've struggled for years to find the words to define the undefinable, for ways to describe the indescribable, to mindfully understand the non-understandable. And I've learned that when I get to the point where there are no words that fit, I've found where I fit.
I imagine how difficult it must be for my "double", in that place of no thoughts or images, to communicate with me through those things. How with each thought or image I create, I place a barrier between us and take one step backward in my search for coming together.
I understand the guides, mentors, soul-speak, higher-self, etc. because they "speak my language". I know the One through lack of language, which because my glove is inside out, is always present.... on the other hand.
Luv, K