Been thinking about this... and while I agree with you that like any body of work, quotes can be used out of context, I generally see quotes as reflecting what the quoter is perhaps going through and not necessarily as a replacement for "you suck" - ie of relevance to the quoter, not directed at who is reading it.. (never been on those fundie forums..)
You wondered if you were perhaps an "idealist", well.. I am wondering if perhaps I am naive.. 
Sure, Daphne --- not necessarily does any quote mean "you suck", heheh. I myself have quoted a lot from DJ, and had no one else in mind but self. No aggressive Intent whatsoever. Yes, it might reflect what someone is going through.
I suppose one has to rely upon one's senses to read through. In that, one takes chances, of course -- one could err in the read, always.
Here's what I see happening sometimes in a lot of toltec forums:
We communicate something to another, intended for the other. Then, when someone responds
to the intent, there are these 2 claims:
1.) You are making assumptions.
2.) You're self-important, because you took this personally.
Convenient how that works, eh?
And then it goes around and around, and sure, the original responder might have done better to not respond at all -- to have simply blown it off would have been the wiser course of action.
But this is when I see "toltec" trends turned into a mindgame, because regardless of whether someone personalized something or not, the intent was put out there to begin with. This becomes a cumulative thing, and before you know it, "attack" becomes justified and routine -- hiding behind the 4 Agreements. And Ninja swordsmen. Energetically, what do you have then? Some sort of battlefield. Burning bodies, blood, the smell of gunpowder.
Is it impeccable? Does it have integrity? Does it grease the wheels of creativity -- does it get us closer to the apprehension of Infinity? Or is it just petty meanness?
And then you have a tyrant like me, running in to stop the whole thing.
If I erred, I am sorry.
