Topic: Birth of Beezelbub

[Josh]

For instance, the development of the power of my thoughts had been brought to such a level that by only a few hours of self-preparation I could from a distance of tens of miles kill a yak; or, in twenty-four hours, could accumulate life forces of such compactness that I could in five minutes put to sleep an elephant. 

At the same time, in spite of all my desires and endeavors, I could not succeed in "remembering myself in the process of my general common life with others so as to be able to manifest myself, not according to my nature but according to the previous instructions of my "collected consciousness."

I could not attain the state of "remembering myself even sufficiently to hinder the associations flowing in me automatically from certain undesirable hereditary factors of my nature.  As soon as the accumulation of energy which enabled me to be in an active state was exhausted, at once associations of both thoughts and feelings began to flow in the direction of objects diametrically opposite to the ideals of my consciousness.

When I found myself in a state of complete dissatisfaction with food and sex, the leading factor of these associations of mine appeared to be primarily vindictiveness and, in a state of full satisfaction, they proceeded on a theme of the forthcoming pleasure of a meal and sex or of the gratification of self-love, vanity, pride, jealousy and other passions.

I thought deeply myself and tried to find out from others about the reasons for such a terrible situation within my inner world, but could not clarify anything at all.

From one side it is clear that it is necessary to "remember myself" during the process of ordinary life also, and from the other side that there is a necessity for the presence of attentiveness which is able to merge, in case of contact, with others.

Though in my past life I had tried everything, even had worn reminding factors of all kinds on my person, nothing helped.  Perhaps these did help a little, while I carried them on me, but if so it was only at the beginning, as soon as I stopped carrying them or got used to them, in a moment it was as if before.

There is no way out whatsoever. . . .

However, there is; there is one exit only—to have outside myself, so to say, a "never-sleeping-regulating-factor."
Namely, a factor which would remind me always, in my every common state, to "remember myself."
But what is this!!! Can it be really so??!! A new thought!!!
Why hitherto could there not have come to my head such a simple thought?
Did I have to suffer and despair so much in order only now to think of such a possibility? . . .
Why could I not, in this instance also, look to a "universal analogy"?
And here also is God!!! Again God! . . .
Only He is everywhere and with Him everything is connected.
I am a man, and as such I am, in contrast to all other outer forms of animal life, created by Him in His image!!!
For He is God and therefore I also have within myself all the possibilities and impossibilities that He has.  The difference between Him and my self? must lie only in scale.

For He is God of all the presences in the universe! It follows that I also have to be God of some kind, of presence on my scale.
He is God and I am God! Whatever possibilities He has in relation to the presences of the universe, such possibilities and impossibilities I should also have in relation to the world subordinate to me.
He is God of all the world, and also of my outer world.
I am God also, although only of my inner world. He is God and I am God!
For all and in everything we have the same possibilities and impossibilities!
Whatever is possible or impossible in the sphere of His great world should be possible or impossible in the sphere of my small world.
This is as clear as that after the night must inevitably come the day.
But how could I have failed to notice such a startling analogy?

I had thought so much about world creation and world maintenance, and in general about God and His deeds; and also had discoursed with many others about all these matters; but never once had there come to my mind this simple thought.  And yet, it could not be otherwise.

Everything, without exception, all sound logic as well as all historical data, reveal and affirm that God represents absolute goodness; He is all-loving and all-forgiving. He is the just pacifier of all that exists.

At the same time why should He, being as He is, send away from Himself one of His nearest, by Him animated, beloved sons, only for the "way of pride" proper to any young and still incompletely formed individual, and bestow upon him a force equal but opposite to His own? . . . I refer to the "Devil."

This idea illuminated the condition of my inner world like the sun, and rendered it obvious that in the great world for the possibility of harmonious construction there was inevitably required some kind of continuous perpetuation of the reminding factor.

For this reason our Maker Himself, in the name of all that He had created, was compelled to place one of His beloved sons in such an, in the objective sense, invidious situation.

Therefore I also have now for my small inner world to create out of myself, from some factor beloved by me, an alike unending source.

There arises now a question like this:

What is there contained in my general presence which, if I should remove it from myself, would always in my various general states be reminding me of itself?

Thinking and thinking, I came to the conclusion that if I should intentionally stop utilizing the exceptional power in my possession which had been developed by me consciously in my common life with people, then there must be forced out of me such a reminding source.

Namely, the power based upon strength in the field of "hanbledzoin," or, as it would be called by others, the power of telepathy and hypnotism.

Thanks mainly to this my inherency, developed in me by myself, in the process of general life, especially for the last two years, had been spoiled and depraved to the core, so that most likely this would remain for all my life.

And so, if consciously I would deprive myself of this grace of my inherency, then undoubtedly always and in everything its absence would be felt.

I take an oath to remember never to make use of this inherency of mine and thereby to deprive myself from satisfying most of my vices. In the process of living together with others, this beloved inherency will always be a reminder for me.

[nichi]

Thanks mainly to this my inherency, developed in me by myself, in the process of general life, especially for the last two years, had been spoiled and depraved to the core, so that most likely this would remain for all my life.

And so, if consciously I would deprive myself of this grace of my inherency, then undoubtedly always and in everything its absence would be felt.

I take an oath to remember never to make use of this inherency of mine and thereby to deprive myself from satisfying most of my vices. In the process of living together with others, this beloved inherency will always be a reminder for me.

Forgive my un-acquaintance with Gurdjieff (something on my list to correct), but I have a question about him-the-man after reading this. Just the man, not his extensive and elaborate philosophy -- not in my question, anyway. .

What is he saying remains "spoiled and depraved for the rest of" his life?
And is he abdicating the use of telepathy and hypnotism? Is he saying that he came to see those activities as "depraved"?

Intriguing.

[Josh]

What is he saying remains "spoiled and depraved for the rest of" his life?
And is he abdicating the use of telepathy and hypnotism? Is he saying that he came to see those activities as "depraved"?

He became depraved because of them.  Its just like the old adage..



Its questionable whether or not he "lost his battle with power" as DJ would say.  Considering that quote of his above, he may have felt this way himself.  What seems clear to me is that the rest of his life was spent in penance, as he directed his energy to education and establishing his institute rather than finishing the work on himself in a concentrated way.

Look at this again:
http://restlesssoma.com.au/soma/index.php?topic=4615.0

Gurdjieff had the means for a very long time.  There is no record that he achieved the "rainbow body", which is the dissolution of the physical form into pure light.  However in almost all of the tibetan cases on record, the physical form does not begin to dissolve until after physical death - a process which takes many weeks.  Yet signs appear somewhat soon after death.  Gurdjieff had a very elaborate funeral and memorial service, so this is unlikely - but knowing G, the quintessential "sly man"... its hard to know for sure without exhuming his corpse.

In the toltec presentation of the rainbow body, there is a more active initiation - possibly due to its structure of lineage and general nature of that system, which is naturalistic and animist based.  It is closer to the pinnacle of shamanism, rather than the pinnacle of esoteric schools.

[nichi]

Penance .. interesting.

[nichi]

Yet signs appear somewhat soon after death.

Like what, for example?

[Josh]

I encourage you to do your own research.  You will get results most relevant to you in that way.

[Michael]

The point being, that his use of his personal power to gain things in this world, had become such an integral part of his common consciousness, that to deny his use of that power would become perpetual reminder. It is only by coincidence that he had used that power for purposes that he described as depraved, except that he is also giving an interesting further indicator, that one can purposely choose to remove from one's being: thoughts and behaviours, those things we indulge in which we would regard as debased in some way.

Everyone has such, and normally they reside in the shadow, so he chose to not indulge, as a reminder technique.

But really that is only secondary. The primary aim is to have a "never-sleeping-regulating-factor". Anything which had become habitual could serve, by exercising our power to not do that habit.

G also went further in this, as for him, the goal of continuous awareness, he took extremely seriously. He actually created a secondary personality, quite different from his own, and played that role with others continuously, only allowing some to see his real self on special occasions. He was a master of not-doing, and constantly made up new ways to sustain his awakeness. The stories of these only really make sense once you understand what he was doing behind his bizarre behaviours.

Another one was to upset everyone he met in the fastest and most penetrating way possible - which caused his whole financial world to collapse, and offered him highly intense awarenesses, not only of his own awareness, but of the inner workings of those around him.

[daphne]

G also went further in this, as for him, the goal of continuous awareness, he took extremely seriously. He actually created a secondary personality, quite different from his own, and played that role with others continuously, only allowing some to see his real self on special occasions. He was a master of not-doing, and constantly made up new ways to sustain his awakeness. The stories of these only really make sense once you understand what he was doing behind his bizarre behaviours.

I know very little about Gurdjief to date. This part though sort of jumped out for me; very fascinating that he could sustain that. The thought occurred to me that it sounds somewhat similar to what DJ may have done with CC..?  (discounting the various theories of whether he was 'real' or not)

[Michael]

There is a story told by one of the people who wrote of their experiences with G, that she was very ill, and she went to G to ask if he could help.

He asked her to come to a little alcove outside his rooms each day, where he gave her to read the latest pages of his book which he was writing at the time. This went on for awhile - I thing it was a couple of months, not sure - after which she was cured. She was extremely thankful, and at their last of these meetings, she said he just moved back slightly into the shadow of the doorway, and she watched his appearance change - she saw a man she had never seen before: full of love and kindness.

She fell in love with him of course, as women do - not that she said it in so many words.

He also talked about this process of adopting a personality diametrically opposed to his real nature, as a technique.

This story also displays something important - the ability of some people to absorb the intent behind a work, be it writing, music or sculpture and so on.  By intent I mean much more than a force of purpose. You can actually contact the person behind the creation, or story, and if that person has/had knowledge, then you can go very deeply into their astral being.

So once you have passed a certain threshold on the path, one of the most enjoyable pastimes is to contact some of the most beautiful beings that have walked this earth, and bring them into, weave them into, your own life.

[Josh]

He was indeed one-of-a-kind, a trickster of intense proportion.  There is another tale of a certain lady who was interested in meeting G, as she was a skeptical type of person and also happened to be extremely prudish.  As they were having a dinner party with other guests, G began to stare at her and caused her to have a physical orgasm right there during dinner.  She said she felt as if she had been pierced through her sexual centre, and described it as "ghastly".   

Also the story about his near fatal car accident.  Quite odd.  He was planning a road trip but absolutely refused to let anyone ride with him, against some of his students wishes.  People around him remarked they felt he knew it was going to happen.  He had the accident, and doctors claimed he never would recover - which he did anyways by staying in his room for a month or so.

However, he did not accomplish his goal of establishing the institute in a lasting way - and this did upset him.  He was really only happy with a small handful of students, most he considered to be missing the point and would continuously try to adapt the teaching style.  Once the institute was dissolved he decided to preserve his knowledge in written form instead.  Near the end of his life his relations with students was almost more of a family situation, where everyone would gather for sunday dinners, drink wine and have good times together. 

Another point that is often not mentioned:

For example, during the Russian period he spoke with respect of the obyvatel, the simple householder or salt-of-the-earth peasant, who lives by traditional values and slowly develops himself. Much later, in Paris, he gave encouragement and financial help to a multitude of people who were hard up for one reason or another. His Paris flat had, people say, one of the world's worst art collections, consisting of pieces purchased from indigent artists as a cover for providing them with funds without humiliating them. Diogenes, the ancient Greek Cynic philosopher whom Gurdjieff resembles, once said of himself that like the chorus master, he set the note a little high so that the chorus would hit the right note. For his pupils and in his writings, Gurdjieff set the note "a little high" as a goal and inspiration, while in his personal conduct he was generous to "the average man." Many such people attended his funeral at the Russian cathedral, rue Daru. Gurdjieff's pupils did not know them.

[tangerine dream]

He also talked about this process of adopting a personality diametrically opposed to his real nature, as a technique.

Hm, this is interesting.

This story also displays something important - the ability of some people to absorb the intent behind a work, be it writing, music or sculpture and so on.  By intent I mean much more than a force of purpose. You can actually contact the person behind the creation, or story, and if that person has/had knowledge, then you can go very deeply into their astral being.