Topic: The Visitor

[Jahn]

I have never called myself a warrior and I don't even know from your perspective what that means. Your ideas and mine may not even be close to the same. If you speak of a Toltec warrior, I know very little of that path, I am just learning it. I walked the Christian path for most of my life.

Right, that fact came to my mind. I am victim for a cultural blindness. Have being into discussions with warriors too long, forgot where I came from ... how the world could be.

That said, if there are lessons to be learned, I need/want to learn them.. if there are things that will hurt, so be it. I am mature enough to accept that.

That is a good stance. Face to the wind. And I am sure that nothing of what I can say will be able to hurt you.

Story telling time.

You seek beauty, accept magic and you have faith and/or trust in your path and spirit. And you are doing this from a deep conviction. And that you found the Native Americans looks like to be a natural step for you – while the Toltec tradition, especially the one presented by Castaneda appear to me to not be the right cup of tea for you. But that is my rambling.

What warriors do one time in their life is that they leave. They actually leave for good and never return, yet you would see them next day at their usual place. You cannot detect any change when you talk to them or in what they do. But I can tell you they are gone.

To do this shift requires extreme efforts and the rewards are few, if any. I shall write a short post here so I cannot go into details but what Toltec’s essentially do is to dismantle their old beliefs system and take up another. The original belief system is what we are conditioned to or have read about. It is a construct of many parts including opinions and charges. Their new belief system is something that propels them forward on their path not a system that holds the ultimate truth.

In this new belief system energy itself has a basic part. All is energy and while the energy in Nagual is infinite the energy in Tonal is finite. So the warrior lives in a world with limited resources because out of that insight comes a set of practical rules how to use the resources in Tonal. And the resources include everything from shoes, newspaper, vehicles to parks and friends.

In the beginning I said that to make the transformation there requires enormous efforts. Efforts is energy depleting, therefore warriors learn how to save energy and how to not waste energy. The first step is therefore to make everything for a purpose. Simply because there is neither time nor energy to do anything without a purpose. Something that would in one way or another add to the transformation process is the number one priority. Now this may sound one-sided, dull and boring but the truth is that there is no more exciting way to live than to live like a warrior with a purpose. What the warrior seeks is a key to evolution and that key is made of unbending intent.

[Quantum Shaman]

And that said... the Red Road does not take me where I need to go. It does not fill that emptiness caused from a knowing that there is something out there that I must journey towards… it does not ease the unending hunger… nor does it quench the thirst of that knowing that I must follow the path, to wherever it leads.. to whatever is waiting there. I simply can not do otherwise.

I realize I come to this point relatively late in life compared to many, but I have been on a spiritual path for almost my entire life… even as a child I felt this need inside… yet no path I have studied or observed to this point rings with surety and truth for me…. it may be that they are fine for others, but I must follow my heart and the knowing that is just inside me, has always been there.

First, I wanted to share with you the feeling of openness and simply joy I get from reading your posts - partially because I know where you are coming from, and partially because there is such a sense of sincerity to your words.

All I can really say here is that I have not yet found ANY road that takes me where I want or need to go - because in the end, that want/need is always changing and evolving and growing, and so a road I walk for awhile takes me part of the way, sharing its knowledge with me, and then - if I am lucky and impeccable and diligent - I usually find myself on a somewhat different road for awhile, and the cycle repeats and life goes on and finally I come to realize that there is no real "destination".  There is only THE road - what don Juan called "the path with heart".  No two of us will ever see it the same way, and that's the delight of it:  it is utterly unique to each of us who travels it, and that is probably the ONLY way we know it is real.

The very best warriors I have ever known are like ravens:  they steal from everywhere, shamelessly and without apology.  Growing up in a Southern Baptist home, I learned more of the Bible than I ever wanted to know, but even though it is not my path per se, it provided me with a foundation of knowledge which was a stepping stone to Zen, and from there to Toltec, and from Toltec into what I can only call "the sorcerer's world."  All of those things are pavers on the path, but the path is YOU yourself.

When you talk about how you simply have to follow your heart, THAT is the path as I have come to see it.  For me, it can only be summed up as a grand love affair with the nagual.  I've stood at the edge of that abyss you described, and I've jumped in, only to discover that it's a moebius loop - a slide that brings us back to our starting point only to launch us forward again, until all we can do is laugh at the irony and learn to love the ride.

I for one hope you won't stop writing about your personal experiences.  To me, that is one of the greatest values of Soma - being able to know one another through our words and our experiences of the world.

Thank you for that opportunity, and thank you for such magnificent portals of honesty.  It is appreciated more than you will ever know.

D

[nichi]

I cupped my hands and called to Owl. His cries were different than the first one. There was a sadness and a plaintive quality that I did not hear the first time. I thought for a moment that it might be connected with the death of the owl I had buried. We called to each other in the warmth of the afternoon sun and I heard his calls come closer. After a while he flew into the pines near where I sat. We stopped calling and sat in silence.

I have a suggestion to make... I'm a believer that these experiences with Owl are very pivotal for you.

What you must do, it seems to me, is go back to the moment you described above.. in visualization or meditation. Go to that timeless, eternal moment where the two of you sat in silence. There's where the message from owl was sent.

The 'filtering down' need not wait for years and years.
But the mind must be quiet to hear the message.
It may not happen on the first try. So then, try later, in a time when all the doubts aren't pressing on you.

[Jahn]

I made another post before explaining that I walked the Christian path for most of my life. I applied myself diligently to that way. I lived it in earnest, the best I could, following the teachings of Jesus.. and of course I often fell short. I had some deeply spiritual moments and felt I was being led by Spirit. But as I wrote in another post, I was ultimately led to a figurative barren mountaintop standing alone in the wind. Spirit had seemed to lead me to through a series of journeys and finally there came a knowing that I had reached the end of that path.

One of the great drawbacks in Christian "teachings" is that the transformation part for Jesus is lost. Not from Jesus to Christ but from Jesus to Messiah. Jesus was a professional regarding divine, spiritual and mundane matters and had been in a school of direct knowledge most of his life before he transformed and was able to start his teachings. It is said that Jesus was the seventh person in a series of persons and professionals in that school that tried to make the transformation from man to Messiah.

The church has not this picture, it cannot provide this knowledge, but you can more about this than me. The fundamental direction is wrong in that we reach out for salvation, in that we relay on the Son of God when there is a possiblity for us all to become divine and sons of God. The whole church of today is built on authority and the church is an institution rather than a place to find growth and evolution. It is in the eyes of this that the New Age statement "we create our reality" shall be seen. It is to put responsibility to our selves but most churches encourage that we seek "help" from God and Christ. That we shall "behave" like good christians. That God has a responsibility for what happens to us - well it is not that straight.

Spirit cannot lead us, spirit can assist and guide us. Spirit cannot lead us because spirit will not cross the line of our will.

And that said... the Red Road does not take me where I need to go. It does not fill that emptiness caused from a knowing that there is something out there that I must journey towards… it does not ease the unending hunger… nor does it quench the thirst of that knowing that I must follow the path, to wherever it leads.. to whatever is waiting there. I simply can not do otherwise.

You got a deep desire for growth and that is a pre-requisite for advancing on the path. That is your light burning and the seed to your unbending intent.

As much as you are moving towards something "out there" your focus should also be to go deeper into your self. To find out what and who you are.

  ~.~

[Jennifer-]

Well said Jahn.. heart felt thank you!

Spirit cannot lead us, spirit can assist and guide us. Spirit cannot lead us because spirit will not cross the line of our will.

[tommy2]

Yerr on it, Jahn.  This is it.  Thank you. t

[Michael]

DC, owl is ok with you because of something inside you, but not to be treated lightly.

However, I want to suggest something to you. You are the first person I have met so far who knows how to blow a note that way. Most who do, know they can wave their outer hand to get a modulation in the note.

If you extend the outer hand further open, increasing the volume, you can produce the most piercing and penetrating sound - very loud. excellent spirit attractor.

might spook the neighbours though.

[tangerine dream]

Great thread everyone.

DC
While reading your posts I was reminded of a journey I went on a couple yeaers ago while investigating a missing part of my childhood.
I was going down the stairs to my Grandma's basement.   A lot of secrets hid there for me at that time.
And Owl came to me a the top of the stairs and took me down when I was too scared to go by myself.   When I got down the stairs I dropped an  egg I was carrying.  I picked up the egg and looked at it in my hand, only to realie i had not hands, but owl wings which were carefully holding my special egg.  I came to realise that Owl was a very special protector for me, protecting the smallest parts of my innner child.

I felt I should tell you this.

[Jahn]

I am taking Jahn's comments to heart.. and have been working to apply them to my path. Thank you Jahn, if you read this post.

You're welcome!