No, of course, Dear, my Path has not ended. It, as I wrote, is taking on an End .... i.e., I have a final goal ...... something I had not ever before. I was not ever aimless, no not for decades, but the much of my absorbtions did not point in any one direction. I lacked self-discipline because I hadn't yet come full circle. I was the center of my quest and this I had to learn by myself, from the action of my own spirit finding how the Holy Spirit had been acting within it all this time. I have been facing myself all along, and I am not calling this wrong or incomplete .... it only lacked authority. I have been fooling myself, surely, by assuming that any power I was touching was emitting from my self, from my awareness or any grasp I was attempting at my awareness. I have not power except through my Will to choose the now-obvious ..... an obviousness totally undetected by me within my past.
But I am speaking, DearHeart, about something which I am barely at the threshold of. All I "know" at this time is that I am changing forms again ..... this time for the last time or for the fullest time. Believe this, though; It takes a changing of forms to realize what I speak of. This is not something of comprehension so my words here, and surely always, will fall extremely short of any mark they may have to bear upon. As proof, my re-reading of this post reveals only foolish words to me, from me, for I am speaking of a renewed faith that Jesus will sustain for me, inside of me because I have not come to realize the gift which was given me by Him before my conception.
And you may think that I know what I am talking about here, but I do not because this is all too new to me ..... the final giving of authority to where it belongs .... and it belongs not in me at all, but in He who created me. No label has changed ...... I have not changed ...... my form has only returned to where I left it before my birth. Now, doesn't THAT sound totally absurd? And even more absurd is my telling you now that my ultimate desire has always been to discover the totality of my existence in this lifetime .... something which I have always thought impossible of me because deep inside I have always known that I lack the authority to accomplish such a task.
But, as I first posted, I am not alone anymore. I have with all of me invited Jesus into my life and now use His strength to make sense of what my purpose in life is. Anything sacred I will surely find in Him and it has nothing whatsoever to do with me.
And the only reason I write these words at all within this forum is that, for some reason, I owe this forum the telling of how I am witnessing this change of my forms. And when I get boring, I am sure I will be so informed.
Goodnight. Tom